Monday, April 12, 2010

Thursday, April 8, 2010

father nose best.

title credit to the father.

Saturday, April 3, 2010



As I jump back into my career & face my anxiety, fear, & guilt, I'm reminded quality over quantity. Which puts things in perspective & making it easier to deal with.

It's not about how much time I spend with K4, it's how I spend my time with him. And the milestones I miss, I'm comforted knowing he'll do them again. and again. and again. Each time just as exciting as the last.

Took a incredibly amazing mom & woman to remind me of this and that I'll be okay, K4 will be okay, & it's okay to be a working mom. Thanks Manang.

“Biology is the least of what makes someone a mother.”
- Oprah Winfrey

Friday, April 2, 2010

I have a question or two...

It's April. IT.IS.APRIL. When did that happen?

Time needs to pump it's breaks & slow it's roll, it's moving way to quick.

K4 turned 3 months Tuesday, where did my newborn go? has it already been 3 months? is it really time for me to go back to work?

Monday marks the official day of my return into the work force and the thought sends me into a panic attack. I’ve been away for 7 months…seriously, that long?

Is it TMI to share that my tummy issues aka IBS, has once again reared it’s ugly head?

I recognize that it’s ridiculous to think my baby is going to forget who I am because I’m away from him for 12 to 14 hours of the day. BUT, that’s 12 to 14 hours of snuggles, laughs, smiles, & tickles I’m going to miss out on. We were just starting to get used to each other & now I have to leave him? I am now kicking myself in the butt for the hours wasted on postpartum depression

How am I going to juggle, being a wife, a nurse, a student & now a mom? Where am I going to find the energy? Am I ever going to get a consecutive 5 hours of sleep again?

What’s making all this easier to digest is the fact that my wonderful mother in law has come to be a full time “Gram,” making this the perfect time to jump back into things. I keep trying to focus on the pros. But, how come the harder we try to focus on the positive the negatives like to show up in bright neon lights with a foghorn in hand?

So, this is my last weekend as a full time mommy & in two days I throw on my scrubs, dust my stethoscope off, & head back to work. It’s like riding a bike, right?

I can do this. I can do this. can't I?